How can I restore my dignity....

Bodendr was so smart tonight. To avoid the charity-testing on his maiden, he wisely directed King Arthur to test my wife according to the order of authority.  If he had not said that, she might have prevented the test. And I could have avoided the humiliation in front of others. Oh, it was such a shame and hard to retreat my perfect renown. Moreover, Kay made the situation even worse when he interpreted the wrongdoing of my wife. I could not help but imagine that and became speechless.

Well, having thought about tonight's incident, I now think my behavior was not chivalric. I was being sarcastic. I should not have put a pressure on the maiden of Karadin to keep her charity. When I think about my maiden, I do not think it is right to say such thing. Oh, I showed not only my wife's wrongdoing but also my conceit. 

Anyways, it is the past and cannot be changed. I need to come up with a good solution. But I do not know how I can restore my dignity and people's respect to me. Oh, I wish I could edit the tale.