Rumor has it...

Rumor has it that there is a knight
Who is wandering about in search for me.
He seeks me with all of his cunning
And no rest he needs.

Upon a small village so far yet so fair
He comes upon people whose glad tidings he bears.
With love they surround him and joy brings him in,
The host with great merry does fill his cup's brim.

At peace does he dwell surrounded by mirth
The host's pretty one...to him she confers.
The game he receives is good to the core
His belly now big from big mighty boars.

But now he grows weary, so weary indeed
His biggest adventure...to this he must flee.
But wait one more day the host does he say
I'll give you direction to find the right way.

Yea, find the right right way indeed
send him my way I'll give what he needs!

Uhhhh...anyone want to step up here?

OK...seriously...that thing that happened the other day while we were all gathered for a feast at Christmastime...yeah...a little bit embarrassing to say the least gentlemen!

Now listen, I understand...it's Christmas...you have a nice big turkey leg on your plate and your cup is full of the finest ale...you have some presents you want to open...I get it...but to not step up and defend this court when a ghastly green man on a green horse comes in and challenges you all, is quite humiliating don't you think?

Thankfully the young Gawain, my own blood, grew brass ones large enough to do something about it! Granted, he wouldn't have been my first choice, but alas, it came to the point where I, Arthur, King of the Britons, almost had to face the challenge myself...and we can't be having that now can we?

Anyways, I just wanted to bring this to all of your attention, because I was quite ashamed by the occurrences in my court on that eve. Now, maybe I should completely stop letting random people interrupt our dinner, and YES, maybe I shall forgo the allowance of EVERY single wish, demand or request by every gate crasher...but maybe, next time, you guys could help a King out here and not make us all look so bad!

Speaking of looking bad...how crazy was it when that knight's head was rolling on the ground? Creeeeepy!!!

More Green-Friendly Challenges...

I left their court after that challenge feeling brave. It was thoroughly satisfying to see the look on the chumps' faces when I instilled fear into the heart of that fool Gawain. That act back there will leave em' thinking deeply for a year...

Now that that challenge has been completed, I can focus on getting this head of mine back on my shoulders and venturing homeward. Let me see if I have that Sir Phillips Head handy. Ah, there it is. Couple turns, few screws...there, good as green.

What's that in the distance? Looks like another one of those chumpy knights. Let me call him and test his mettle. Say you, what's your name? Really? I always thought that that was a woman's name. I guess I was wrong.

Where are you headed? That's not too far from here. Since that pathetic looking horse of yours is in such agony would you be up for a challenge? Good.

If you are brave enough, I challenge you to try and take a swipe at this leaf I hold in my hand with your sword. If you are able to take both it and my hand off before I drop it after saying go, you can have this mighty green steed of mine. Ready? Good. Go...

Ah, well done dear pasty looking fellow. As I have spoken thus it shall be. Take this steed and I will look after yours. Well, there goes my valiant horse. I really ought to reconsider challenging every courteous knight that crosses my path...

Oh, hello there young friend. Would you be up for a challenge? Nothing in the world is much more gratifying...

My Fulfillment of God's Wrath

I do not fear the Incubus that harbors within me, for I have my justifications. I don’t regret suffocating two pagans that had nearly killed my Christian allies. I was compelled to ponder these two questions: Did my rage justify my authority to carry out God’s divine judgment—to take away one’s life? Did I not kill a pagan's life to preserve a Christian's life, which is arguably more valuable in the eyes of the Savior?

In the event of the attack, my party was immobilized by an evil spell. I chose to fight the enemy, for my allies were possessed in a trance, and they were fast approaching death. I will never forget how Niviane had looked so helpless when she remained enchanted by necromancy. Rage exploded at the sight of her unconsciousness. The pagans committed the utmost heresy. No penance would have atoned for this rash behavior.

These two sorcerers had practiced many pagan rituals, which had predestined their damnation. One such ritual was the worship of artificial idols, for they pledged an allegiance to a mythical God. The sorcerers failed to recognize one true God, and they fell to heresy repeatedly saying God’s name in vain. They had no intention to spread the teachings of Jesus Christ. Therefore, I couldn't have witnessed the horror that would have ensued from the pagans' malice, and I was driven to suffocate the sorcerers with sulphur and to entomb both of them in separate pits. I moved the stone slabs in such a way to present the flames visible for all. The flames are a true testament of my greatness as a magician. I have fulfilled God’s wrath, in order to deliver Christ’s children and to cast away pagan souls.

Oh, Dearest Gawain!

I had forseen your arrival, and with greatest respects told Arthur of your great strength (no doubt deriving from your great lineage!). If only he had taken my account more seriously, as he knows I have never deceived him! Instead he snuck away from my side, and tried to ambush you - which only left Kay and he embarrassed as you knocked them into the stream! I knew he would do that; he acts as if I am utterly unaware! I did, however, find pleasure in showing Arthur his horses and the ring you gave me the following morning, as I had prophesized receiving these that night, furthering Arthur's sense of shame. And then to think he halted in telling you your identity until you completed a task that he and his men could not! I was thrilled to hear that you had successfully proven yourself to Arthur, although I, too, knew this would happen. You truly are a wonderful knight. I am pleased to call you Arthur's and my nephew. May your strength and fame increase greatly, and may you always strive to be the best knight.

Entombed in the cave

The story of the lovers in the Prose and Suite Du Merlin is a reflective one for me. When Merlin leaves his king and cause, abandoning all that he has striven to achieve for the sake of redemption and honor, he realizes that he has come to a lamentable pass. He says "I have given up all to be with you but I have gained nothing by following you." He is left to lie forever, captured by a heart that had no willingness to love or be moved by him. Rather it was the love of sport, the chance to enchant the enchanter that leads Niviane to cast her spell upon the sorcerer. The emptiness that follows is the punishment for betraying the vows and missions of a lifetime, for the empty specter of love that has no guarantee of lasting through the turbulence of life itself. Most times, you are left, like Merlin, entombed in the cave, lost and forgotten.

My Un-fair lady...

I, Sir Kay, was recently humiliated in my own King's court. It is well known that I am the most loyal follower to our great King Arthur. I will knowingly go out to any lengths to defend his honor, and the honor of his court. I will gladly do battle with man for just a chance to uphold the King's name and honor. Since I am the most noble, and fair knight, I have complete faith in my self. So when a knight brought a mantle to our Court, for the ladies to try, I knew my lady would be of the fairest kind, since I am such a noble and strong knight. Alas, I was mistaken. I told her "come forward; you may take the mantle unafraid and fearless. there is no one your equal here in truth and faithfulness...With honor and distinction we two shall carry off the victory today." This lady has ashamed and dishonored me, for the mantle did not fit. She is apparently not worthy of my company, and now I am on the hunt for a more proper and deserving maiden...